RetreatBird

RetreatBird for Companies · the deliverable, published

This is the plan you get. Read the whole thing before you tell us anything.

For teams of eight to about 16: three real venues at their own published prices, every line either priced with its arithmetic shown or marked open with the question we are asking, and a draft agenda — within 48 hours of your brief. Entirely in writing. No call, nothing to pay to get it, no sales process to sit through.

Send the brief on Tuesday after lunch. Read the plan before Thursday’s stand-up.

First question first: does your team fit?

Venues with a published price and evidence of taking a group, whose own site or listing states they can hold that many. Counted as this page loads. Unknown capacity is never counted as a yes, which is why these numbers are smaller than the catalogue.

8 people30 venues12 people23 venues16 people8 venues20 people6 venues25 people3 venues30 people2 venues40 people2 venuesMore than 40nothing at all

If you are planning a company-wide offsite for eighty, that last chip is your answer and you have lost thirty seconds rather than two days. The leadership-team version of that offsite — eight to 16 people — is the thing we are actually good at, and it is what the rest of this page is.

Every price published by the venue itself Every venue fact traced to its own site or listing Nothing behind an email box

What is real on this page, and what is illustrative

Real

  • The three venues. They are in our catalogue right now, and you can open their listings from here.
  • The prices. Each one is the venue’s own published per-person price, divided by its own number of nights. We do not mark them up.
  • The maths. Every total is computed when this page loads, from those prices.
  • The venue facts, each one quoted from the venue’s own website or from the listing it published itself. Where a fact is missing from both, the page says so instead of filling it in.

Illustrative

  • The brief. We wrote it. There is no client behind it, and no company is named because none exists.
  • The agenda. It is a draft written for this brief, the way yours would be written for yours.

We have not run a corporate retreat yet. So there is no case study on this page, no client logo and no testimonial — inventing any of those would be both illegal and, frankly, the fastest way to lose you. What we can show is the work itself.

The eight questions this document answers

In this order. If yours arrives and one of them is unanswered, we got it wrong.

  1. 1Which venues can genuinely take a team of 12 — and how do you know?
  2. 2What do three nights cost, per person and for the whole group?
  3. 3What is inside that price, and what is definitely not?
  4. 4Where does the money go that isn't the venue?
  5. 5What would the three days actually look like, hour by hour?
  6. 6What do you not know yet, and when will you know it?
  7. 7What does RetreatBird charge, and how is it charged?
  8. 8What happens if we read this and say no?
Example brief — written by us, not a client

We read the brief

Eight lines. This is genuinely all we need to start — and the form at the bottom of this page asks for even less, because everything except your email and your headcount is optional there.

Who
A 12-person leadership team, no company name — this brief is ours, not a client's
When
Three nights in October, Thursday to Sunday
Flying from
Amsterdam and Berlin, arriving within the same afternoon
Budget
€1,500 per person, everything included
Purpose
Set next year's plan, and fix how the team works together
Shape of it
One full working day, one day outdoors, nothing scheduled after dinner
Rooming
Single rooms preferred, twin-share acceptable
Must have
A space we can work in indoors if it rains

We turned the brief into filters, and ran them

Every venue that fell out fell out for a stated reason. The counts below are computed from our catalogue as this page loads — not typed in by a marketer.

StepThe rule we appliedVenues left
Everything we holdVenues in the corporate layer, facts read from their own sites99
With a real priceA per-person nightly rate we can derive from a published listing97
Evidence of a groupTheir own site or listing states group capacity, whole-venue hire, or hosting companies41
Actually fits 12Stated capacity of 12 or more. Unknown capacity is not a yes23
Reachable from AMS and BERIn Europe — no long-haul on a three-night trip7
Leaves room in the budgetVenue line at most €250 per person per night, so half the €1,500 stays free for travel and food6

The filter we chose not to apply

The brief asks for an indoor space to work in. Only 2 of the 6 venues that survived the funnel actually stateone on their own website. We did not make it a hard filter, because a missing fact usually means nobody wrote it down — not that the room doesn’t exist. So it became the first question we put to the others, in writing, and you see their answer rather than our guess. And before asking, we looked at the other place a venue writes things down: one of the three below describes an indoor room on its own RetreatBird listing, in a sentence we quote in the option itself.

How the three were picked

By how much we can prove, not by what we would earn. Venues rank on evidence — states it hosts companies, states the whole place can be hired, states a workshop space, states a capacity — and ties break towards the cheaper venue. It is a function in our code with the inputs listed in that sentence — not an editorial pick, and not a paid placement: nobody on this page paid to be on it. Ranking on evidence is not the same as ranking on fit, which is why the next table scores all three against the brief, line by line, and why they do not come out in the same order.

We priced three of them, in full

Here they are side by side first, because that is the question you actually have. Every cell is either a published fact or the words “not stated” — there is no third category, and nothing is estimated. The deep dives underneath show the arithmetic and the source of every one of them.

OptionPer personper night3 nightsper personGroup of 123 nightsSleepsMealsIndoor spaceWi-fiAirportBrieflines met
Option 1 · Heartful MotionPlaya El Brosquil, Spain$123.50€114$370.50$4,446€4,09012 — exactly yoursNot statedOn their siteNot statedNot stated1 of 7
Option 2 · AmoralezaLanjarón, Spain€150€450€5,400€5,40040 statedBreakfast, Lunch, Dinner — hedgedOn their siteNo Wi-Fi, by choiceGranada and Malaga4 of 7
Option 3 · YogaMea SchoolProvince of Rimini, Italy€90€270€3,240€3,24025 statedBreakfast, lunch, dinnerOn their listingListed as includedRMI6 of 7

The group column is the venue line only — 12 people × 3nights at the venue’s own published rate, with meals where the venue includes them. Flights, transfers and the off-site day are not in it, and they are not zero either; they are yours to set, a few sections down.

Heartful Motion

Option 1

Heartful Motion

Playa El Brosquil, Spain

$123.50

per person, per night

€114 at a fixed rate

350 m2 house near Cullera (Valencia), 3-minute walk from beach, with 6 rooms and enclosed porch for yoga practice.

Where this price comes from

$494 per person for 4 nights, published by the venue on 4 Day Silence & Meditation Infinite Consciousness & Yoga in Spain. $494 ÷ 4 = $123.50 per person per night.

That programme is not what you are buying — you are hiring the place for 3 nights. It is the rate the venue itself set, which is why we start there instead of from a number we made up, and why the venue confirms it in writing before you approve anything.

Against the brief, line by line

TightTakes 12, with room to spare

States 12, which is exactly your 12. There is no slack at all: one plus-one, one facilitator, one person bringing a partner, and it fails. We would put that in writing to them before you shortlist it, not after.

It has 6 rooms, all of which can be booked for 1 or 2 people, some with 2 separate beds and others with bunk beds. — their own website

Not metSingle rooms preferred

6 bedrooms for 12 people. The 12 only fit if every room is a twin, which means nobody gets a single — and at single occupancy this venue takes 6. The brief says singles preferred, twin-share acceptable, so it is allowed. It is still the line that would make somebody in your team unhappy, so it is here rather than in a footnote.

It has 6 rooms, all of which can be booked for 1 or 2 people, some with 2 separate beds and others with bunk beds. — their own website

MetSomewhere indoors to work

Enclosed porch of the house used for yoga practice, with awnings in summer and glass + underfloor heating in winter.

We practice yoga at the porch of the house, which is closed by micro-perforated awnings that let air and light in while keeping insects out for summer, during winter it is protected by glass and heate — their own website

UnknownWi-fi that survives twelve laptops

Neither source mentions connectivity at all.

UnknownMeals in the price

Nothing on their site and nothing on their listing says what the rate covers at the table. We checked both before writing that sentence. It is not budgeted at zero — it is asked in writing.

UnknownOne short hop from AMS and BER

No airport on their site and none on their listing. It changes the flight line, so we ask rather than guess.

UnknownThe place to ourselves

Neither source says whether the whole place can be held for one group on your dates.

The budget, line by line — 12 people, 3 nights

LineHow it is worked outPer personGroup of 12
Venue — 12 people × 3 nights$123.50 per person per night × 3 nights × 12 people$370.50$4,446
MealsNothing on their website and nothing on their own listing says what the rate covers at the table. We checked both. We ask in writing and you see the answer — this line is open, and open is not the same as zero.
Airport transfersNo nearest airport on their site and none on their listing. First thing we ask, and it changes the flight line, so we won't invent it.
Return flights, Amsterdam and BerlinYours to set — your travel policy, your booking tool, your dates. We publish no flight benchmark because we would be guessing at your fares.
Off-site day and activitiesQuoted by the venue once you pick a direction, in writing, before you approve.
RetreatBird planning feeA flat fee, agreed in writing before anything is booked, on this line and nowhere else. Never a percentage of your spend, so it cannot grow when the venue quote grows, and never inside the venue price. The figure is in your plan, next to these numbers, before you commit to anything.in your planflat, not %
Priced today — Venue onlyThe venue line. The open lines above are not zero — they are unanswered, and they get answered in writing before you approve anything.$370.50$4,446
In euros, for comparisonConverted at one fixed indicative rate we use across the whole catalogue so options can be compared. It is not a quote and not today's mid-market rate.€341€4,090
Left of the brief’s €1,500What remains per person for flights, transfers, the off-site day and our fee, plus every meal.€1,159€13,910

The line to forward

$370.50 per person for 3 nights at Heartful Motion, room only — nothing they publish says what the rate covers at the table. $4,446 for the team of 12 (about €4,090).

Travel, the off-site day and our fee are on top and are listed above as open lines. That is the whole number the venue side of this trip costs at their published rate.

What we don’t know about this one yet (4)

  • What the rate covers at the table: meals, drinks, dietary requirements. Not published in either place, so we do not budget it at zero.
  • Nearest airport and how long the transfer takes.
  • Whether the whole place can be held for one group on those dates.
  • Working wi-fi, and whether it survives twelve laptops.

These go to the venue in writing. You get their answer verbatim, before you approve anything.

Amoraleza

Option 2

Amoraleza

Lanjarón, Spain

€150

per person, per night

Off-grid sanctuary on 4.35 hectares near Órgiva, Granada, with yurts, hemp buildings, cabins, a geodesic dome and natural swimming pool.

Before you forward this one: what the linked programme is

What you would be hiring is the place for 3nights, not the programme it normally runs. But if someone on your team clicks the listing below, this is what they will read, in the venue’s own words:

  • Ayahuasca and cactus ceremonies
  • Rapé and sananga sessions
  • Ceremonial work with ayahuasca and cactus rooted in Brazilian spiritual tradition
  • Live music woven into ceremonies to deepen the healing experience
  • Complementary tools including rapé and sananga for energetic cleansing
  • Integration support offered alongside all ceremonial sessions

We are not going to pretend that is a detail for a Head of People. If it rules the venue out for you, it should — and it takes ten seconds here rather than a shortlist later.

Where this price comes from

€750 per person for 5 nights, published by the venue on 5 Day Healing Path Journey: A Shamanic Retreat in Southern Spain. €750 ÷ 5 = €150 per person per night.

That programme is not what you are buying — you are hiring the place for 3 nights. It is the rate the venue itself set, which is why we start there instead of from a number we made up, and why the venue confirms it in writing before you approve anything. It is also their cheapest published option — Camping — and the table below prices the difference to a private room rather than leaving you to find it.

Against the brief, line by line

MetTakes 12, with room to spare

States 40. Your 12 fit with 28 places of slack — a plus-one, a facilitator or a late joiner does not break it. The venue published that figure itself, on its own RetreatBird listing — first-party, with no sentence to quote.

MetSingle rooms preferred

Their own listing publishes a single or private room category, so a single room is a thing they sell rather than a favour we would be asking for.

Private Yurt/Cabin/Ecobuilding — their own RetreatBird listing

MetSomewhere indoors to work

Geodesic dome and yurt temple for ceremonies, workshops, and gatherings

The geodesic dome and yurt temple provide spaces for ceremonies, workshops, and gatherings, supporting both personal and collective experiences. — their own website

Not metWi-fi that survives twelve laptops

Their own site says they choose not to use Wi-Fi. The brief has a full working day indoors, so we are not going to file that under charm: on this brief it is close to disqualifying, and it is the reason we would not draft your agenda against this option.

we have a strong mobile phone and internet connection, we choose not to use Wi-Fi — their own website

TightMeals in the price

Their listing ticks breakfast, lunch, dinner — and, in the same breath, publishes a line that narrows it. Both are quoted below, because printing only the generous half is how a budget goes wrong at the venue rather than on the page. Diets catered for: Vegan, Gluten-free, Nut-free.

Vegan meals — their own RetreatBird listing

2 or 3 meals/day — their own RetreatBird listing

MetOne short hop from AMS and BER

Their listing names Granada and Malaga as the nearest airport, and says nothing more than that.

Granada and Malaga — their own RetreatBird listing

UnknownThe place to ourselves

Neither source says whether the whole place can be held for one group on your dates.

Room categories they publish: Private Yurt/Cabin/Ecobuilding — €950 for 5 nights · Shared Yurt/Cabin/Ecobuilding — €850 for 5 nights · Private Bell Tent — €910 for 5 nights · Camping — €750 for 5 nights

Their own listing's room list and prices, unedited.

The food, in their words: All meals provided are fully vegan and home made using fresh ingredients and local and organic ingredients when available. Everything is gluten, sugar and caffeine free, supporting participants' physical wellbeing throughout the retreat.

From their own RetreatBird listing.

Getting there: 45 minutes south of Granada and 30 minutes from the Mediterranean Sea

we are located 45 minutes south of Granada and 30 minutes from the Mediterranean Sea. — their own website

What their listing says is NOT in the price: Flights · Airport transfer

Their own exclusions list. This is question three of the eight, answered from their page rather than ours.

The budget, line by line — 12 people, 3 nights

LineHow it is worked outPer personGroup of 12
Venue — 12 people × 3 nights€150 per person per night × 3 nights × 12 people€450€5,400
MealsInside the rate above — breakfast, lunch, dinner, per the venue's own listing, with their own qualifying line quoted in the facts above. Not an extra line, which is the whole reason this rate is not comparable to a room-only hotel rate.includedincluded
A private room instead of the cheapest bedThe rate above is their cheapest published option (Camping, €750 for 5 nights). Their cheapest private one — Private Bell Tent — is €910 for the same 5 nights, so €32 more per person per night × 3 nights. The brief prefers singles, so this is what preferring them costs, in their numbers rather than ours.+ €96+ €1,152
Airport transfersTheir listing names Granada and Malaga as the nearest airport, and says nothing more than that. They do not publish a transfer price, so the venue quotes it — we are not going to invent a taxi fare.
Return flights, Amsterdam and BerlinYours to set — your travel policy, your booking tool, your dates. We publish no flight benchmark because we would be guessing at your fares.
Off-site day and activitiesQuoted by the venue once you pick a direction, in writing, before you approve.
RetreatBird planning feeA flat fee, agreed in writing before anything is booked, on this line and nowhere else. Never a percentage of your spend, so it cannot grow when the venue quote grows, and never inside the venue price. The figure is in your plan, next to these numbers, before you commit to anything.in your planflat, not %
The venue's own deposit termsNot a RetreatBird charge and not an extra line on top. It is the booking term the venue publishes on the listing we link, quoted here so nobody meets it for the first time on their page. Whether the same term applies to a 3-night hire for your team is one of the things the venue confirms in writing before you approve anything. Their words: "A €250 deposit is required to secure your place and is non-refundable. If you need to cancel more than 40 days before the retreat, the deposit may be transferred once to another Amoraleza retreat taking place before 2028."
Priced today — Venue + mealsThe venue line, meals included in it. The open lines above are not zero — they are unanswered, and they get answered in writing before you approve anything.€450€5,400
In euros, for comparisonPublished in euros — no conversion applied.€450€5,400
Left of the brief’s €1,500What remains per person for flights, transfers, the off-site day and our fee — food is already in the line above.€1,050€12,600

The line to forward

€450 per person for 3 nights at Amoraleza, with the meals their listing lists. €5,400 for the team of 12.

Travel, the off-site day and our fee are on top and are listed above as open lines. That is the whole number the venue side of this trip costs at their published rate.

What we don’t know about this one yet (1)

  • Whether the whole place can be held for one group on those dates.

These go to the venue in writing. You get their answer verbatim, before you approve anything.

YogaMea School

Option 3 · lowest venue cost · best fit for this brief

YogaMea School

Province of Rimini, Italy

€90

per person, per night

Yoga school offering residential teacher training courses and retreats in Misano Adriatico, Italy and Rishikesh, India.

Where this price comes from

€900 per person for 10 nights, published by the venue on 10-Days 10-Night Beach Yoga Retreat + 2 Ayurvedic Massages, Italy. €900 ÷ 10 = €90 per person per night.

That programme is not what you are buying — you are hiring the place for 3 nights. It is the rate the venue itself set, which is why we start there instead of from a number we made up, and why the venue confirms it in writing before you approve anything.

Against the brief, line by line

MetTakes 12, with room to spare

States 25. Your 12 fit with 13 places of slack — a plus-one, a facilitator or a late joiner does not break it. The venue published that figure itself, on its own RetreatBird listing — first-party, with no sentence to quote.

MetSingle rooms preferred

Their own listing publishes a single or private room category, so a single room is a thing they sell rather than a favour we would be asking for.

Single Room Ideal for solo travellers. Features include: One single bed Private bathroom with shower Air conditioning Balcony (most rooms) Free Wi-Fi Television Safe Hairdryer — their own RetreatBird listing

MetSomewhere indoors to work

Their listing describes an indoor room that already hosts workshops. It is their sentence, not our inference.

Hotel Arno is home to the YogaMea School Yoga Studio, where most yoga classes, workshops, and teacher training sessions take place. — their own RetreatBird listing

MetWi-fi that survives twelve laptops

Wi-fi appears in what their own listing says the rate includes. Whether it carries twelve laptops at once is still a question for them.

Free Wi-Fi — their own RetreatBird listing

MetMeals in the price

Their listing lists breakfast, lunch, dinner, water unlimited as part of the rate above. So the nightly figure is bed and board, not a room you then feed twelve people out of. Diets catered for: Vegan, Gluten-Free, Lactos-Free.

three meals a day — their own RetreatBird listing

MetOne short hop from AMS and BER

Their listing names Rimini & San Marino "Federico Fellini" International Airport (RMI) and describes the journey itself, quoted below.

Rimini & San Marino "Federico Fellini" International Airport (RMI) – Nearest Airport Distance: approximately 8 km (10–15 minutes by car) The most convenient airport for reaching our retreat. — their own RetreatBird listing

Not metThe place to ourselves

Their listing describes rooms in a partner hotel rather than a place a group takes over. You would be twelve guests among other guests. Everywhere else on this page we say a retreat centre to yourselves beats a room block — so here is the option where that is not what you would get.

YogaMea School has an exclusive partnership with a family-owned 3-star hotel group, allowing us to offer comfortable accommodation just a few steps from the beach in Misano Adriatico. — their own RetreatBird listing

What the transfer costs, per their listing: Daytime: around €45 · Night-time: around €60 · Price: €20–30 per person, depending on your arrival time (day or night) and the number of passengers sharing the transfer.

Their own published fares. We have not marked them up or averaged them.

What their listing says is NOT in the price: Insurance · Flight · Transfers · Massages · Rental bicycle · Caffè · Extra Drink · alcolic Drinks

Their own exclusions list. This is question three of the eight, answered from their page rather than ours.

The budget, line by line — 12 people, 3 nights

LineHow it is worked outPer personGroup of 12
Venue — 12 people × 3 nights€90 per person per night × 3 nights × 12 people€270€3,240
MealsInside the rate above — breakfast, lunch, dinner, water unlimited, per the venue's own listing. Not an extra line, which is the whole reason this rate is not comparable to a room-only hotel rate.includedincluded
Airport transfersTheir own listing publishes €20–30 per person for a private transfer. Both directions: × 2. Their taxi fares are quoted in the facts above, so you can price it either way.€40 – €60€480 – €720
Return flights, Amsterdam and BerlinYours to set — your travel policy, your booking tool, your dates. We publish no flight benchmark because we would be guessing at your fares.
Off-site day and activitiesQuoted by the venue once you pick a direction, in writing, before you approve.
RetreatBird planning feeA flat fee, agreed in writing before anything is booked, on this line and nowhere else. Never a percentage of your spend, so it cannot grow when the venue quote grows, and never inside the venue price. The figure is in your plan, next to these numbers, before you commit to anything.in your planflat, not %
Priced today — Venue + full boardThe venue line, meals included in it. The open lines above are not zero — they are unanswered, and they get answered in writing before you approve anything.€270€3,240
In euros, for comparisonPublished in euros — no conversion applied.€270€3,240
Left of the brief’s €1,500What remains per person for flights, transfers, the off-site day and our fee — food is already in the line above.€1,230€14,760

The line to forward

€270 per person for 3 nights at YogaMea School, with breakfast, lunch and dinner included. €3,240 for the team of 12.

Travel, the off-site day and our fee are on top and are listed above as open lines. That is the whole number the venue side of this trip costs at their published rate.

We left these lines for you to fill in

The venue column is ours to prove. Flights are yours to know — and a benchmark we invented would be worse than the number already in your last expense report. So here is the same table with your numbers in it, computed in the page, sent nowhere. Food is only added to the options whose venue does not already include meals; the ones that do are marked, and typing a food figure will not double-count them.

Your four numbers

Per person, in euros. They start empty on purpose — we don’t publish an invented benchmark for your flights or your appetite. Type what your own last trip cost and the table redraws.

OptionVenuepublished, per personYoursper personAll inper personGroup of 12vs €1,500the brief’s ceiling
Option 1Heartful Motion€341no meals published€341€4,090€1,159 under
Option 2Amoraleza€450incl. breakfast, lunch, dinner — hedged€450€5,400€1,050 under
Option 3YogaMea School€270incl. breakfast, lunch, dinner€270€3,240€1,230 under

The venue column is real: it is the price the venue itself published, multiplied by 3nights, with meals inside it wherever the venue’s own listing says so. Everything to the right of it is your number, not ours — nothing you type here is sent anywhere, and there is no email box in front of the answer.

We drafted the three days

For Option 3, YogaMea School. Eight and a quarter hours of scheduled work across three days, four sessions on the working day, and nothing at all after dinner — because the evening is where the actual team building happens and it does not need a facilitator.

Why not Option 1, which the ranking put first?

Because the ranking scores how much a venue has published about itself, and the brief scores something else entirely. Against the 7 lines in the table above, Heartful Motion meets 1 of 7 and YogaMea School meets 6. The deciding lines: takes 12, with room to spare; single rooms preferred. A plan that drafts the agenda around the venue we can say the most about, rather than the one that fits, is a plan written for us.

Thursday · Day 0 — arrive

Nothing is scheduled. People land tired and that is fine.

TimeWhat happensWho owns it
16:00Arrivals, rooms, kettle. No welcome talk, no icebreaker.RetreatBird
18:00Walk out together before dark. Optional, and everyone comes.Your team
19:30Dinner. No agenda, no laptops, no seating plan.Venue
21:00Nothing. This is the point.Your team

Friday · Day 1 — the working day

Four sessions, all before dinner. Longest is 90 minutes.

TimeWhat happensWho owns it
07:30Optional movement in the indoor space. Half the team will skip it.Venue
08:30BreakfastVenue
09:15 – 10:45Where we actually are. The year in numbers, read in silence for ten minutes, then questions only.Your team
10:45Break, outsideYour team
11:00 – 12:30The three things we stop doing. Silent written round first, then one pass around the table, then a vote.Your team
12:30LunchVenue
14:00 – 15:30Walk-and-talk in rotating pairs — three rotations of 25 minutes, phones left behind.Your team
15:45 – 17:15Decisions, written down as they are made. One page: what, who, by when.Your team
17:15Free until dinnerYour team
20:00DinnerVenue

Saturday · Day 2 — outdoors, then the honest hour

The day people remember. One session, late afternoon.

TimeWhat happensWho owns it
08:30BreakfastVenue
09:30 – 15:00Off-site: a long walk and lunch out. Route, transport and cost confirmed with the venue in writing before you approve anything.*RetreatBird
16:00 – 17:30How we work — a retro on the team, not the product. Five questions, sent round the week before so nobody is improvising.Your team
18:00FreeYour team
20:00Last dinnerVenue

Sunday · Day 3 — leave

45 minutes of work, then out. Nobody drafts the recap on the plane.

TimeWhat happensWho owns it
08:30BreakfastVenue
09:30 – 10:15Who tells whom, by when. Write the note that goes to the rest of the company before anyone gets in a car.Your team
10:30DeparturesRetreatBird

* Why some lines are marked

Those rows wait on something YogaMea School has not published: the off-site route and its cost. They appear in the agenda as times, never as costs, and every one of them is in the list of questions we send the venue. You get the answers in writing before anything is booked. The meal rows are not marked, because YogaMea School publishes what it serves — that is the difference a published fact makes to a document like this.

What arrives, and when

Send the brief on Tuesday after lunch. Read the plan before Thursday’s stand-up. Forward it to your CFO on Thursday afternoon, and every figure in it survives being opened by someone who is looking for the catch — because the arithmetic is printed next to the answer.

It arrives as an email with the same sections you have just read, in the same order. No portal to log into, no deck to sit through, no call to book. If you want a change, you reply to it.

We have not delivered one of these to a paying company yet, so the 48 hours is a commitment published in advance rather than an average we are quoting at you. Which is why it comes with a failure mode: if it is going to be late you get an email at hour 40 naming the line that is missing and when it lands — not silence, and not an apology at hour 49.

  • Within 48 hours

    Of the brief landing, not of a call being scheduled. Late means you hear at hour 40, with the reason.

  • Zero calls

    We don't do them. Everything in writing, so everything is forwardable.

  • Nothing to pay us, no card

    The plan is free before you decide anything, and free after you decide no. Venues have their own booking deposits — where their listing publishes the terms, we quote them in the tables above rather than let you find them later.

  • Yours to keep

    Venues named, linked and priced. Book them direct if you'd rather.

Where this stops working

Better you read it here than find out in the plan. All four numbers below are counted from the same catalogue the options came from.

40

The largest group any LISTED venue states it can take. Above that we source: the plan still comes back in 48 hours, with venues whose own sites state a size covering your group and their answers on your dates. The listed number is what is bookable today, not the size of brief we take.

45 of 99

Venues that state a group capacity at all. For the rest it is genuinely unknown, and unknown never gets rounded up into a yes.

0

Corporate retreats we have run. No case studies, no logos, no testimonials, no ratings — and none invented to fill the gap.

23

Countries with a venue in the corporate layer. Deep in some, one venue in others — the plan tells you which you are looking at.

What we are genuinely good at is the size of team at the top of this page: eight to about 16. The counts are the reason for that number, not a preference — 30 venues state they can take 8, 23 venues state they can take 12, 8 venues state they can take 16, 6 venues state they can take 20, 3 venues state they can take 25. Past that the list thins to a handful rather than a choice, and above 40 there is nothing at all. What you get at that size is usually a retreat centre rather than a room block in a hotel with a partition wall — and where it is not, as with one of the three options above, the page says so in the option itself instead of leaving you to discover it.

Bigger than that? Send the brief anyway, in one line.

If you are eighty people, we will tell you we cannot do it — by email, within the same 48 hours, without a call and without pretending otherwise. And if the leadership-team version of that offsite is a real thing for you — eight to 16 people, three nights, one working day — that is the brief we would rather have, and it is the one this whole page is about.

Send the smaller brief instead

The questions you were going to email us anyway

How long does this actually take?+

Send the brief on Tuesday after lunch and the plan is in your inbox before Thursday's stand-up. That is the commitment: 48 hours, no call in between, no scoping session first. If a venue is slow to confirm something we send the plan anyway with that line marked open, rather than sit on it and miss the window.

And if you miss the 48 hours?+

You hear from us at hour 40, not at hour 49 — an email saying which line is missing, why, and when it lands. We have delivered none of these to a paying company yet, so treat the 48 hours as a commitment published in advance rather than a statistic we are quoting at you. It is on this page so you can hold us to it.

What does it cost?+

The plan is free and there is no deposit to get it. If you go ahead, we charge a flat planning fee agreed in writing before anything is booked, and it appears as its own line inside the same budget you just read. It is never a percentage of what you spend, and it is never buried inside a venue price — so it cannot grow when the venue quote grows. The exact figure is in your plan, next to the venue prices, before you commit to anything. We do not publish one on this page because we have not run a corporate retreat yet, and a number posted today that we had to walk back on your dates would be worse than no number at all.

What do you need from me?+

The eight lines in the example brief above. That is the whole ask: headcount, nights, month, departure cities, budget, purpose, rooming, and the one thing that has to be true. No forms to chase, no discovery call, no procurement pack.

Do we have to get on a call?+

No. We don't do calls at all — not a discovery call, not a demo, not a 15-minute intro. Everything happens in writing, which also means every price and promise you get from us is something you can forward to your CFO without paraphrasing it.

One of these venues runs a plant-medicine programme. Why is it in a corporate plan?+

Because what you would be buying is the place for three nights, not the programme it usually runs — and because hiding it would be the worse answer. Where a venue's own listing describes ceremonies or plant medicine we print its words at the top of that option, so nobody on your team clicks a link from your email and finds something you did not expect. If that rules it out for you, it should, and you have lost ten seconds rather than a shortlist.

Are these the prices we'd actually pay?+

They are the prices each venue published itself, per person per night, taken from a real programme on its own page and divided out. We do not mark them up. Where a venue publishes several room categories we show the cheapest and the difference to a private room, because the headline price is usually the cheapest bed in the place — sometimes literally a tent. A three-night hire for your team is a different product from the programme those prices come from, so the venue confirms its own figure in writing before you approve anything; if it comes back higher, you see the higher number, not a revised story.

What happens if we read it and say no?+

Nothing. The venues are named, linked and priced in the document, so you can take the plan and book any of them direct without us — that is the deal, and it is why the plan is worth reading. We send one email asking what you decided; say the word and that stops too.

Now send us yours

Same eight lines as the example brief. You get a document like the one above — your headcount, your dates, your budget, real venues, real arithmetic — within 48 hours. No call, nothing to pay us for it, and it is yours to keep whatever you decide. Venues set their own booking terms; where their listing publishes one, we quote it rather than let you find it afterwards.

Headcount is the one thing we can’t guess: every venue we shortlist has to have stated, on its own site or listing, that it can take a group your size. Put the real number in — there is no headcount that makes this the wrong form. What is listed on the site is what you can browse instantly; above that we source.

Everything below is optional — it just makes the plan sharper

Free. Within 48 hours. No call is offered or scheduled, and no deposit is taken.
Rather just write to us? hello@retreatbird.com

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